The Doctor is On?

The purpose of this blog is to improve moods at the Shabbat table... please print and share...

So, how did your Menorschach test go last week?

Here's another way of testing yourself and everyone at the table...

Have you ever heard of a medical clown?

Since the late 1980s, medical clowns have been lifting the spirits of pediatric and senior patients around the world. The benefits apparently include:

• Reducing stress
  
• Stimulating endorphin production (which reduces pain)
  
• Boosting the immune system by increasing T-cells and lowering cortisol levels
  
• Improving moods and increasing coping mechanisms
  

It seems to me these outcomes are plausible and maybe even obvious.

(For most patients; however, there is also a condition called coulrophobia — the irrational fear of clowns.)

But the topic raises several questions you can ask at your table.

First, should pediatricians perhaps all dress as clowns?

Second, if a clown can help a hospital patient, what about a less-severe illness, like the common cold?

Third, how would you like a clown to visit you when you are ill?

Finally: What do you think is the active ingredient here, humor or empathy?


Shabbat Shalom

PS - Here we are at the end of the tax year....a reminder that every donation to JSLI is tax-deductible and that every Amazon purchase can trigger a donation to your favorite charity by using http://smile.amazon.com.... at zero cost to you! Please choose Jewish Spiritual Literacy as your grantee in order to support this weekly email and our other worthy programs. 

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Menorschach Test?

The purpose of this blog is to add some psychology to the Friday night dinner table... please print and share... 

Last week, my presentation of the religious-secular debate received both praise and criticism.

This week, instead of presenting competing points of view, let's make it more like a Rorschach test.

Remember Rorschach tests? They put you in the driver's seat - you get to be the interpreter.

(Apparently your act of interpreting an ink blot reveals something about you. You can try them out here.)

So here's your Menorschach test. Your first image is an original menorah artwork by Allison Garber that many will appreciate (click on it if you want a larger version):

First question - What's the message of the image?

After you ponder that for a few minutes, let's look a very different menorah image and ask your table the same question. 

Here it is:



Question: What does it mean to you?

I hope these questions aren't too obvious and give everyone at your table food for thought and fodder for talk.

But let's add one more question to seek some synergy — Look back at the two menorah images: which appeals to you more, and why?


Happy Channukah

and

Shabbat Shalom


PS - Mindful that we're rushing toward the end of the tax year, did you know that every donation to JSLI is tax-deductible? Did you know that every Amazon purchase can trigger a donation to your favorite charity by using http://smile.amazon.com? Please do so and consider choosing Jewish Spiritual Literacy as your grantee in order to support this weekly email and our other worthy programs. 

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Hello Darkness?

The purpose of this blog is to light up the Friday night dinner table... please print and share...

Last week, we offered you superheroism on a silver platter.

This week, a different kind of heroism.

Here's the scenario:

Picture lighting a candle outside on a sunny day. Not much to see, it doesn't seem to cast much light.

Light that same candle in a dark room, and the light leaps out at you at one hundred eighty-six miles per second.

Same candle!

What does this mean?

Does it mean that darkness creates light?

Or does it mean that darkness makes light relevant?

Here's a dialog that I witnessed online this week between a theist and an atheist (I made them blue and green to help you follow who is saying what)...

I wish Jews were more strict about not assimilating because we have such a long and unique history, it’s such a shame seeing it come to a stop simply because people don’t really care.

You should get downvoted to oblivion. If the Haskalah movement (Jewish Enlightenment) did not take place the world would’ve been deprived of all the famous secular Jewish scientists, mathematicians, politicians, business leaders, artists… of the last almost 200 years.

If not for the Haskalah, maybe Moshiach would be here! The rise of secular humanism also led to two world wars, atom bombs, and tremendous human suffering. I'd take peace on earth over science, business and art any day.

You can’t seriously attribute the two world wars, especially the 2ed and rise of the Nazis to secular humanism. The nazis were literally a rejection of humanism the antithesis of it! I’ll leave moshiach out of this one but I wouldn’t wait around for him to show up but Einstein did not “delay” him.

Scientific advances in a world of secular humanism will inevitably lead to advancing the goals of imperialism, regardless of the driving ideology (Hellenism, Fascism, Communism, Pax-Americanism). But had Einstein and those Jews of his ilk devoted their incredible brainpower to Torah, Avodah and Chesed....

Are you insane? Um no science does not lead to imperialism, the world is way more complicated than that. And nothing is inevitable. If Einstein and the great jewish scientific/political/mathematical/philosophical secular leaders wasted their time re reading jewish sacred texts the world would be a much darker more dangerous place!

That ain't what I said. Read it again.

Scientific advances in a world of secular humanism does not lead to imperialism… I simplified but still is a pretty radical unsubstantiated opinion to hold!

It's only radical to someone with an emotional commitment to the system. But consider: secular humanism leads to all sorts of moral positions, including passivism and including (sometimes), "might makes right". At those times - given the technical means - wars will happen. What Russia and China are doing presently is merely a current example of this.

There's more, but that's enough for today's question for your table:

What do you think? Who wins the debate - Judaism or secular humanism?


Shabbat Shalom

and

Happy Channukah!

PS - Mindful of the countdown to Channukah, I'm guessing that you may be doing some shopping on Amazon - did you know that every Amazon purchase can trigger a donation to your favorite charity by using http://smile.amazon.com? Please do so and consider choosing Jewish Spiritual Literacy as your grantee in order to support this weekly email and our other worthy programs. 

Superhero?

The purpose of this blog is to make you the hero or the Friday night dinner table... please print and share...

Quick - how many different uses for baking soda can you name? 

At least three?

How about twenty-two?

Does that seem like a random question?

Following last week's topic, on relating to other people (did you enjoy the double-linked animated image?), this week it's all about mine, truly (i.e., you).

So if you did pretty well on that opening question (meaning, you could come up with more than three), you may very well be a DIY-er. 

But here's the easiest way to tell: If something's broke, would you prefer to fix it yourself, or to pay someone else to fix it for you?

Or perhaps someone at the table is a super-DIY-er - the kind of person who won't throw out that broken headset because maybe one day you'll come up with a hack for it.

Well, I admit I'm being charitable, because the spouse of a person like that would call him (it's usually a him) a pack-rat or a hoarder. 

– "It's broken."
– "But it can be fixed!"
– "It's broken!"
– "But it can be fixed!"
– "It's broken!"
– "But it can be fixed!"

So as a public service, for the promotion of shalom bayit, I'm pleased to share with you a fixit hack that I learned this week. This is for all of those impossible-to-fix things like broken plastic knobs or stripped screws, or stripped screw holes in particle board — all of those frustrating things that you wish you could fix but that you're just about ready to throw in the trash — here's the hack....

It turns out that cyanoacrylate (also known as super glue) can be incredibly strengthened when thickened with calcium bicarbonate (baking soda). 

When I say incredibly strengthened, I mean like rock hard. Like as in hard as a rock. 

The basic hack is this: take whatever needs fixing — whether you're trying to reconnect an impossible plastic break or trying to strengthen a hole — first pour in some baking soda and then fill it with super glue. (If needed, make a masking tape mould first.)

Here's a six-minute video full of practical applications of this hack.

You will be your family's superhero, and you will thank me for it.

And I will say, that's my job, to make you the hero.

So, Hero, here's the final question for your table: Who would be the bigger hero - the one who tries to go it alone, fix the widget and yet fails? Or the one who calls the repairman?


Shabbat Shalom

PS - OK, now we're really into the countdown to Channukah...

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Going Up or Down?

The purpose of this email is to get up-votes at the Shabbat table... please share!

Last week's rare bird - my video message in honor of Thanksgiving - received a spectrum of responses, from praise, to criticism to "the link doesn't work!"

Don't know why the link didn't work for some, but the above should work for everyone.

Yesterday, I had an impromptu meeting with the principals of a certain Jewish school. Inside the building, as I walked through the hallways toward the office, I genuinely enjoyed that two-minute stroll. Everything was clean and tidy, through the classroom windows I spied what appeared to be engaged students, and the teenagers who passed me went out of their way to be friendly. 

Sitting with the principals, I described this pleasant experience, and they seemed genuinely pleased to hear the unsolicited feedback. I know that they (like most principals) are working very, very hard to improve their school and I expect my comments were validating.

But then one of them asked, half-jokingly, "Do you say that about every school you go to?"

The answer is... well, no, I don't say that if it isn't true, but I do indeed try to look for something positive to say. Why not begin a conversation with something positive? 

This is this week's question for your table: Is it better to begin every conversation with something positive, or are there times when this would be inappropriate?


Shabbat Shalom

PS - Here's the official countdown to Channukah...

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Why Turkey?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The purpose of this blog is to give you something to gobble about at the Hodu table...  

Just for fun, in honor of this special day, this week: a video message.

Please click on the turkey and enjoy!





Chodesh tov, Hodu-tov and...

Shabbat Shalom

PS - Don't forget the countdown to Channukah...
 

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It Isn't Eight Billion...

The purpose of this blog is to have a full cup at the Shabbat table... Please share...

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It Isn't Eight Billion.... it's really only eight thousand millions!

When you put it that way, it doesn't sound like so much, right?

Or does eight thousand millions sound like a larger number to you?

Question for your table: Are there other things that sound totally different when you express them with different (but equally true) words?

Try this one: what would you rather hear from a doctor: "It's going to take 45 days to heal" or "It's going to take 6 weeks to heal" ...?

Or: "You scored 88 percent!" versus "You got 7 out of 8 correct!" versus "You only missed one out of eight!" — which sounds best?

When Steve Jobs introduced the first iPod, he didn’t say: “This device has a storage capacity of 5 gigabytes;" rather: “You can fit 1,000 songs in here!”

Evidently, even the size of the font can change the way we perceive numbers:

Compare: 7 billion v. 8 billion.

What do you think?

Question 2 for your table: Is this entire discussion just an elaboration of the adage, "Is your glass half full or half empty?" 

But if you think of it, that old saw doesn't need to be binary; there's arguably a third option - can you think of what it is?

Final question for your table - if you purposely express something in a way that makes it see bigger / smaller / cheaper etc., is that a form of deception?

Shabbat Shalom

PS - You do know how many days til Channukah, right?

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Rising in the Poles?

The purpose of this blog is to find the pintele Yid at the Shabbat table... Please share...
Happy Birthday shoutout to Amy and Happy Anniversary to Amy and Lawrence!

Last week's story was about poor Steve. This week went in the opposite direction.

"Steve" is already taken, so let's call this week's hero Joey.

Joey appeared at my office this week, not to see me but to conduct some repairs. Management had sent him.

Most of these guys are super-friendly. If you ask them about their work, they'll be happy to chat. Like the guy who came to install a new lock - I asked him his opinion about various lock qualities and he had plenty to say, and seemed pleased that someone cared about what he thinks.

But compared to average, Joey was unusually chatty. I merely praised his work and that was enough for him to start telling me about his training and experience. Within minutes he shifted to, "Yeah, I'm Catholic but my wife's Jewish. She does that Hannukah thing and all that, I don't mind, it don't bother me, it's kinda nice." 

OK, that was an interesting and unexpected turn of the conversation. Was there even more?

Once the tap was removed, Joey's story came bubbling out. First it was about how the most important thing to him is to be a person of honesty and integrity, "If I make a mistake, I'll fix it, and if someone's a liar or a cheater, I won't have nothin to do with him."

After at least ten minutes, the real story came out: "On my father's side, I'm one part English Puritan, one part Roman Catholic. On my mother's side, I'm one part Episcopalian and one part Ashkenazi."

"What do you mean one part Ashkenazi?"

"Yeah, my grandmother was Polish Ashkenazi. She didn't want to talk about it, because she married my grandfather who was Episcopalian and all, but that's who she was."

Before I could comment, Joey starts showing pictures on his phone, of his grandmother, of his kids, of his DIY remodeling projects, of his hunting trophies. Another ten minutes.

Finally, as he was leaving, I said, "You know Joey, according to the rules, if your grandmother was Jewish, that means that your mother is Jewish. And if your mother is Jewish, that means that you're Jewish."

"I hear what you're saying, but I don't know, maybe it goes after the father - I have all these traditions and things that come from my father."

Question for your table — What would you have said at this point? 

This is what I said:

"All that is on the outside. On the outside, you're your father's son. But on the inside you're Jewish. Maybe this Hannukah instead of watching your wife light the candles you can join her!"

Shabbat Shalom

PS - Do you know how many days til Channukah?

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Why Me?

The purpose of this blog is to give some purpose to the Shabbat table... Please share...
Happy Birthday shoutouts to David and Harmon!
Are you counting the days til Channukah?

Why Me?

OK, here's a true story for your table that happened to someone I know this week.

Let's call him Steve.

Like many people, Steve has had a few health issues the past couple years. Each problem individually always seems manageable. The thing is, as soon as he gets one under control, another one always seems to pop up. 

Do you know anyone like that? (In truth, I know several "Steves" who fit this description.)

This week he had one of those moments.

It was the morning a couple days ago. He was doing some chores around the house, thinking, "I actually feel pretty good today!" which is always a great feeling, especially when you don't feel that way every day.

Immediately upon having that thought, he gets down on the floor to fix something in the kitchen and when he starts to get up, he feels a wrenching pain in his knee and cannot get off the floor. 

The first question for your table: If it were you, how would you yourself react at that moment?

Steve tells me that two words came to mind at that moment: Why me?

So let's pose this as the second question for your table: What's your answer to Steve — why him?

Shabbat Shalom

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Tumbledeeds?

The purpose of this blog is to protect the Shabbat table ecosystem... Please share...

Do you know how many days til Channukah?

Try asking this at the table tonight:

Did you ever see a real tumbleweed? Do they actually exist?

Or do they only exist in Tinseltown's "Wild West"?

I saw my first real tumbleweeds in 1990. I was on I-10, somewhere near Joshua Tree, heading east across a patch of desert that looked more or less like Wile E Coyote's territory. 

My reaction was, "Cool, tumbleweeds." And that was about the most brain power I ever devoted to the subject.

But what would you do if you came home to this?

Now we know: not so cool. It's a highly destructive invasive species that probably originated in Eurasia and came to North America in the 1800s. And they're now found in Australia and Africa. 

What is arguably cool is the ingenuity of the plant. (Actually, there are many different plants that make tumbleweeds.) The basic idea is that the tumbleweed originates as the flower of plant that dies, dries, and falls off. But inside that tumbleweed is a thousand seeds waiting to be activated. The weed blows around until it finds a resting place moist enough to activate its seeds. 

This is leading to a question for your table.

If people had intentionally brought in this destructive species, we could have someone conveniently to blame, like the pythons in Florida or the Japanese knotweed in England.

Even Antartica is threatened.

But most of the time, it's inadvertent. 

So for your table: Is there a takeaway? Is there a meaningful lesson from the tumbleweed? Is there lemonade to be made from this lemon?

Perhaps - just perhaps - the lesson is to be found in the solution. The only way to tackle this very real problem is massive cooperation, not only within a society but between countries. Is it possible that we will one day look the invasive species as a gift that gave all of humanity a common enemy that could unite us?

Or perhaps the lesson from the tumbleweed in particular is to remind us that when you do an act of kindness for someone, you've sent out a packet of "kindness seeds" that may blow in random directions and take root in unexpected places.

Shabbat Shalom

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Reality... What a Concept!

The purpose of this blog is to reboot the Shabbat table... Please share...

Do you know how many days til Channukah?

As I mentioned last week, we are just now wrapping up Sukkot and the Holidays.

Real life can now begin again.

But what is "real life"?

To nurture this topic, for your table tonight, I would like to offer:

(a) A radical idea about reality
(b) A realistic fact about reality
(c) A question about reality

The radical idea about reality is that contemplating even a single wonder of nature is one of the fundamentals of cultivating spirituality and therefore we should strive to make such contemplation part of our daily routine. But not to make it "routine" - it must be juicy — an experience of radical amazement. 

For example, once a day try pausing to appreciate the incredible human body.

Or the wonders of a single cell. Or the miracle of DNA (or this). Or Einstein's Big Idea. Or quantum entanglement. Or...?

But here's the realistic fact about reality which you already know: not everyone gets turned on by the same WOW. 

For example, this week I took a few kids to the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History.

I personally had one goal: experience the eye-popping wonders of Geology, Gems and Minerals. 

But guess what — to get to Geology you first have to walk through Oceanea and dodge Mammals, etc. etc. Trying to get even three people to follow the leader in a place like that is like taking a child through a candy store. My WOW may not be the same as your WOW.

For example, I know one person who LOVES the daily download from the JWST (click on the image above for a full-screen WOW) and I know another person who finds these photos rather dull....

Question for your table: What's your WOW?

And all this amazement leads to the promised question about reality... What about inward contemplation? 

On this topic, you may have heard about the Baltimore-based organization called the Holistic Life Foundation that has been successfully lowering rates of violence, truancy and general mischief in public schools by replacing detention with meditation.

Into a room of pillows and lavender, an elementary school student walks, enraged.

He’s just been made fun of by another student, an altercation that turned to pushing and name-calling. But rather than detention or the principal’s office, his teacher sent him here, to Robert W. Coleman Elementary School’s meditation room.

“I did some deep breathing, had a little snack, and I got myself together,” the boy recalled. “Then I apologized to my class.”

Let's lob this one to the table - What would be a more pertinent daily practice: contemplating a wonder of nature, or cultivating serenity?


Shabbat Shalom

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