If Choice Were a Choice, Would You Choose to Choose?

Table Talk from the desk of Rabbi Alexander Seinfeld

August 12, 2023 • 25 Menachem Av 5783 • Parshas Re'eh (Deut 11-16)

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Did one of you reading this happen to share last week's Table Talk about children with my 1-year-old grandson?

Because yesterday Menachem - busy, busy, busy - somehow got his hands into a jar not meant for his hands and his mouth onto the contents of the jar that are not meant for his mouth.

The jar is an activity/game that you can get for one of those long August afternoons or for an evening around the campfire.

It's called "Choices in a Jar."

You take turns pulling these dilemma cards out of the container. When it's your turn, you have to answer the question you draw.

Here are two samples that I randomly drew just now in order to share with you . . . try asking them at your table:

1. If you had to choose: Always be tired or always be tense. What's your choice?

2. If you had to choose: Go back in time and say or do one thing you never got to say or do, or take back one thing you said or did. What's your choice?

(Thank you, Menachem, for reminding us of this wonderful family activity.)

Shabbat Shalom

PS - In case you were wondering, the dilemma that Menachem decided to chew on was, If you had to choose: Wear all pink or all purple to school every day. What's your choice?

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Boray Pree

Bar and Bat Mitzvah gift suggestions at bestjewishkidsbooks.com.
Mazal tov to Mordechai Zev and Aviva Margolese, who were married yesterday. It is rare and special to dance at the wedding of a couple who were both recently widowed. And mazal tov to Sophia Felson who is celebrating her entrance into the Covenant (Bat Mitzvah) this week. May all of you enjoy much nachas in your new phase of life and give much nachas to your families!

Boray Pree
When the rabbi made the first bracha under the chuppa, he pronounced the words, "boray pree ha-geffen."

Yosephi (7), sitting beside me, whispered to me, "Is it ha-geffen or ha-gaffen?"

He was pretty sure he'd heard his father pronounce the final word "ha-gafen". In fact, he has heard me say "ha-gafen" every Friday night for seven years - over 350 times! Not to mention holidays etc.

First question for your table: What do you think was my reply to Yosephi?

Answer: "Some people say ha-geffen and some people say ha-gaffen."

He thought about that for a minute, then observed, "People with long beards say ha-geffen, and people with short beards say ha-gaffen."

Which reminded me of Mr. Rosenthal.

Mr. Rosenthal lives in a nearby assisted living home where the kids and I sometimes visit. He is 92 or so, and has vivid memories of fighting the Japanese island-to-island across the Pacific.

A few months ago, Mr. Rosenthal told me, "My father wanted me to go to yeshiva but I didn't want to. I should have listened to him! Now it's probably too late for me to learn anything."


Second question for your table: How did I respond to Mr. Rosenthal?

Obviously I told him it's never too late, but to start with small steps.

"What's an example of a small step?" he asked.

"Did you ever make a bracha? Like a ha-motzee? Or boray pree ha-gaffen?"

"Yes, I used to make those brachas. It's been many years, I think I still remember them."

"So the first small step you can take right now is to make a bracha on your food before you eat it. It will give you a meaningful Jewish connection without much effort."

"OK, I will. I'm going to try it."

My next step - give him a copy of my book, The Art of Amazement. Remember that book? Do you know how often someone asks me a question that is answered in the Art of Amazement? That's why I wrote the book, to answer all your most basic questions about Judaism but were afraid to ask. And if you already got them answered, to remind you of the answers.


And if you know all the answers, so that you can share them with others.

As Hillel says, "If not now, when?"


Shabbat Shalom!